Does Counseling Help?

Where would you go?
What Should I Expect from a Counselor?
What Benefits are there to Counseling?
When Should the Whole Family Go?

Where would you go?

While finding counselors is not difficult, finding one that fits your personal style, needs and family can be. The following is a list of procedures you might try for locating counseling assistance:

•  Call local mental health department
•  Call any community agencies that may be near you
•  Look in your telephone book in the yellow pages
•  Call your local crisis line
•  Call your Church, Doctor, or Hospital
•  Check with your local Hospice
•  Call local funeral homes
•  Call neighbors or relatives for recommendations
•  Use your computer and Internet to locate services near you

What if I do not have the money for a counselor?

Counseling services are sometimes free. Check with the sources listed above to see what might be available, but remember services that are free are often limited to time availability and counselors who are willing to donate their time. If you want more choice in whom you work with and when you see them you may have to locate funding for getting help. Community agencies should be able to help you with this search. You can also try local churches, charities or even libraries for additional information about what might be available in your community.

What should I expect from a counselor?

Every state has criteria for registering counselors who collect a fee for services. It is important that you call your local mental health department to get a list of the registration criteria for your county or state. They may even have a list of registered counselors who live and work locally. Once you contact a counselor, for your benefit and safety ask for a disclosure statement about their services before beginning counseling. If they do not have one you may want to work with a counselor who does.

Counselor Disclosure statements should include items such as:

•  Client rights during counseling
•  Counselor information regarding values, education, training, experience, techniques and methods.
•  Service information clarifying fees and costs, accountability, making appointments, billing practices, record keeping and confidentiality.

What benefits are there to counselling?

Counseling is the process of one individual (or more) helping another individual (or more) to improve their present way of thinking and behaving in a problem or crisis situation. These helpers are often called Counselors. Counselors are people who have special knowledge, skills and experience that benefit the people receiving the help, who are usually called clients.

Benefits for clients to become involved in the counseling process can include any or all of the following:

•  having someone listen to their concerns without over reacting or being judged
•  developing new perspectives of their problem situation
•  becoming more aware of how trauma can affect people's lives
•  engaging in learning activities that help them to develop new strengths
•  understanding essential dynamics of interpersonal relationships
•  getting help with communication breakdowns
•  learning about the stages of the grieving process
•  having a place to collect their thoughts and to vent their feelings
•  obtaining assistance for developing goals and action plans
•  learning about additional resources within the community for obtaining assistance
•  acquiring interpersonal skills that can help them to cope more effectively
•  doing all of the above with confidentiality

When should the whole family go?

The death of a loved one can pull families together or it can make them become more disjointed. If there were strong feelings of resentment and anger before a death those feelings can become more noticeable in the months after the funeral. Families that have a high level of trust between its members will help each other with much of the grieving process. These families pull together and check on each other as the months go by. Families that had communication problems and trust issues before the death will most likely still have those same problems afterwards, unfortunately even to a larger degree.

Having an outside source or counselor work with the whole family can be valuable for reestablishing the communication and trust families need to grow in positive ways. It is really important that the helping provider have training in family work or what is often called family systems training. Working with the dynamics of the relationships within the family is just as essential as working with each of the individuals is. This type of family assistance can help to turn a negative family event into a positive growth experience. While the pain is still there individuals learn how to live with it rather than be devastated by it.